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    Frequent Drinker Miles – Two drunken Germans, looking for a bathroom during a conference at Frankfurt airport, got on a plane by mistake and flew to Moscow. By the time the Lufthansa flight touched down in Russia, they had sobered up and realized they lacked not only passports but entry visas, too. The Russians shipped…

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    Where are all the movies? “Maybe they don’t really have to give out Oscars this year. Instead, the Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences could just award little blue ribbons to every movie released.”

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    Beware the french fry! – This twelve-year-old was arrested (handcuffs and all!) for eating fries in the Metro Station. Apparently, garbage was causing all kinds of problems in the stations, so they outlawed eating. Adults caught eating would normally just get a fine, but juveniles charged with criminal offenses must be taken into custody. ……

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    Police recover $1,000 worth of doughnuts – “We hit the mother lode. It’s a truckload of doughnuts!” the officer barked into his radio.

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    Evening Cross-Dressing Now Legal in Tasmania – thank god – no more running home to change before sundown.

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